Rockhound.

"So I was just relaxing in the dirt this morning... minding my own business."

"When I noticed this rock sitting there next to me. Looked like it might be fun to chew on a little bit.  Limestone. Maybe kind of tasty. "

"So I started to sneak up on it. Gotta be a stealth machine in order to catch a good rock like this one."

"Got a little closer."

"A little closer. Then a nice long pause to make it think it was still safe. You gotta fake out some of these minerals.... others are, well, dumb as rocks."

"Choosing just the right moment, I POUNCE!"

"After a brief struggle, I was able to wrestle it into submission."

"Don't worry! It never felt any pain."